Sixtyfive Roses: A Sister's Memoir by Heather Summerhayes CariouBlue Archipelago Reviews

Sixtyfive Roses: A Sister’s Memoir by Heather Summerhayes Cariou is the touching and insightful account of a family rocked by Cystic Fibrosis.

My Book Review Rating: 6 stars – thought provoking and insightful; everything I ever read before it has paled into insignificance

I have just finished reading this amazing book, and having wiped the tears from my eyes I am now sitting here wondering how on earth I can write a review that can do it justice. All I want to do is implore you to read it.

I have never had any interest in non-fiction, who needs memoirs and biographies when you can escape with all that delicious fiction? Having read Sixtyfive Roses my thoughts have changed. Over the last 14 months I have written countless reviews, exclaiming that I had found amazing books that must be read. They all pale in comparison. In fact I feel so strongly about what I have just read that I think I will need to take a few days to digest it, and learn from the powerful messages delivered within it. It could be a while before I’m ready to pick up another book.

For those of you who need a little more insight into just why you should read this book I’ll try and explain why it’s so powerful. Sixtyfive Roses is Heather’s account of her family’s journey into the world of Cystic Fibrosis. When her little sister Pam is diagnosed with CF at the age of six, Heather promises to be her protector, and die with her so she doesn’t have to suffer alone. At the time of diagnosis Pam was given months to live.

On her death bed, at the age of twenty-six, Pam implores her sister to write their story. To tell the world what they lived through. It is some years later before Heather puts pen to paper, to tell the story that “lies somewhere between truth and memory”. But the story she tells is powerful and insightful. Of the sheer determination on the part of her parents, who found the Canadian Cystic Fibrosis Foundation in an attempt to help Pam and other children who suffer with CF. Of her turbulent teenage years, where she finds herself torn between emotions of guilt for being healthy and anger and jealousy towards her sister. Of her younger brother Jeff, who is also born with CF, but lives in the shadow of Pam, whose disease is more virulent and life threatening.

Heather shares the story of her sister’s courage, kindness, honesty and generosity. Of her fight to live life to the full, and give something back to the world before she is forced to leave it prematurely.

The story of their lives is beautifully written and is almost poetical at time. In sharp contrast to the cruelty of the disease that threatens to darken their lives, is the love of the family that shines through Heather’s account.

Readers whose lives have also been touched by illness, disease will perhaps find a ray of hope and clarity. Those of us who haven’t will discover a new understanding and an appreciation for all that we sometimes take for granted.

I am here living and breathing. I am here eating blueberry pie, sipping ice tea, and for a moment it feels sinful to be so alive. Until I remind myself that this is how Pam would want me to feel. She would want me to revel in the warmth of the sun, the taste of her favourite dessert, and even the sultry humidity that once made it so hard for her to breath. She would want me to live and grow in all the ways she imagined I could. To live for myself, not for her. Yet I still can’t help being aware that I am living a life Pam never got to live.

So I try to never take my life for granted, to live consciously, holding nothing back. yet there are moments when I’m frozen in fear. Fear of not getting this life right. Fear of not holding it precious enough. Fear of failing Pam. [...] This wrestling with my feelings never ends, but that’s good, because it means I’m fully human and alive. I am healing.

www.cysticfibrosis.ca

5% of proceeds from the sale of the book will be donated to Cystic Fibrosis foundations in Canada and the US.